Which, will probably be the greatest thing to happen to the property since the opening theme song to the movie.

Here’s a grab from the article:

So my brief was to produce a non-tiny-child-oriented GI JOE. Which necessitated reading just a toxic amount of research, leading me to birth an odd, lumpy, normal-for-Norfolk-looking hybrid of the comic and the cartoon. The idea was, as I understand it, that bringing in a writer with absolutely no nostalgia for the property would give them the tone they were looking for. I think they were happy when I presented them with the initial list of characters I was going to just kill. And then the list of things I was going to blow up.

The people at Hasbro were actually remarkably supportive. And I did apologise after shouting at them those times. And they did give me one of those conversations that you never really expect to have when growing up:

HASBRO: No, Warren, you cannot wipe Beijing from the face of the earth.

ME: Shit. (pause) What about Moscow?

HASBRO: Wiping Moscow from the face of the earth would be fine.

And for those who don’t get the joke about the intro to the movie….here you go. One of the best/worst things that I have ever seen.

Wait. On watching that, I realize that I had forgotten that G.I. Joes had jetpack. I don’t have a jetpack. Where is my jetpack? I want my goddamned jetpack.