Psst, psst.

C’mere.

I don’t want anyone else to hear this. They’ll get mad if the secret gets out.

I’m going to tell you the truth about that whole “Hawking says there is no God.” lede you’ve been seeing everywhere. You know, the hubbub that’s spinning out of lines like this:

“Spontaneous creation is the reason why there is something rather than nothing, why the universe exists, why we exist,” he wrote.

And this.

“It is not necessary to invoke God to light the blue touch paper [fuse] and set the universe going.”

From his new book “The Grand Design”. (Out next Tuesday from Bantam Books, get your copy now! The publishers and marketers are working hard to get you to care!)

And the truth is this:

The publishers know what they are doing, and they’ve released ONLY the introduction to the book. A book which posits that M Theory is the only viable solver for a non-supernaturally created universe. An introduction which, when released like this, as the intended purpose of PISSING EVERY BELIEVER ON THE PLANET THE FUCK OFF. Which causes them to write about it, and causes the press to cover those writings.

But what I guarantee you isn’t in that introduction, but is somewhere in that book is a bit where Hawking will admit that M Theory, while not overtly active, probably does in fact meet some of the definitions of God.

After all, if M Theory really does solve out and create a unifying theory of everything, wouldn’t that, oh, I don’t know, BE GOD?

So, all of this vitriol and rhetoric that’s flying around right now? Don’t buy any of it. It’s all just hot air blowing about. It’ll die down in no time at all.

But, then again, I wouldn’t go buying the book either. Because even if you do, you’ll be justifying the publisher’s tactics to sell it.

That’s what libraries are for, after all.